I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
you had me at cake vodka
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
