Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
