all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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