is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Boobs speak an international language.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
