I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
