why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
