ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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