dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
