Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
