she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
