This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
