he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
The adults are the big ones right?
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