around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
