I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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