so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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