Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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