i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
