I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
