Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
