Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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