Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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