That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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