If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
