if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
