You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
