yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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