i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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