I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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