He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Randomize
