no. you can't hotbox the world.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
foreskin is a definite game changer
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
