how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize