I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
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