What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
