if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
