This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Randomize