Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
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