I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
