i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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