weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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