apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
