It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Randomize
