i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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