Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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