Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Randomize
