I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
