are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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