haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
time to smoke my breakfast
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize