Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
This baby is an asshole
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize