meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Randomize