What did we do last night that was yellow?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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