I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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